Sorry I have been MIA for the last couple of weeks. Truth be told I just have not done anything Blog worthy in a while. I know I need to spice up my life a bit. But my friend sent me the following email and I just thought it was hilarious. Keith don't get any ideas!
Dear Mrs. Jones:
Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Jones has been causing quite a commotion in ourstore. We cannot tolerate this type of behavior and have considered banning the entire familyfrom shopping in any of our stores.We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. Three of our clerks areattending counseling from the trouble your husband has caused. All complaints against Mr.Jones have been compiled and are listed below.
Mr. Wally WorldPresident and CEO of Wal-Mart Complaint Department
MEMO
Re: Mr. Jones- Complaints - 15 Things Mr. Jones has done while his spouse is shopping:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren'tlooking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the hunting dept.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' inhousewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invitethem in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, "Why can'tyou people just leave me alone?"
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knowswhere the antidepressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible"theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different sizefunnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!""PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetalposition and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
(And; last, but not least!)
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door and waited a while; then, yelled,very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
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5 comments:
That is so funny
Too funny! Boys get soooo bored in stores, I know, I have 4 of them, that's including my husband. Isaac (3 year old) calls those circular racks for cloths volcanoes, they really do look like volcanoes when you're standing up in the cart looking down.
That's a good one. Les get's kind of board when we go shopping there. I wonder how John feels.
i've read this before and it makes me laugh and cry! boys!
I laughed so hard I cried. This is very funny!
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